labelleizzy: (check please shitty)
Story Title: Open The Bottle, Dex
Fandom: Check, Please! (webcomic)
Link(s):check it out on the AO3
Warnings: None. Teenage hockey boys falling in love (or realizing they HAVE fallen)
Characters: Will (Dex) Poindexter, Christopher (Chowder) Chow, Derek (Nursey) Nurse
Pairings: Nursey/Dex/Chowder
When I Started: Last year, summer of 2016, as a prompt!fic on Tumblr
How I Lost My Shit: I just got... most of the way done, then stopped. Recently have been diagnosed with ADHD and am practicing habits of Completing What I Start by finding ways to be held accountable.
How I Finished My Shit: I joined WIP Big Bang and I finished by July 14 "because I said I would", thus holding myself accountable by promising someone else I would finish it.
labelleizzy: (bunny writer)
That bowl turned out pretty good!
So did the rest of my stuff!
This bowl, below, was the one that just opened up easily and made itself. It's turned out with a really thick base and walls. It's sturdy, not delicate. (Like me.)
labelleizzy: (bunny writer)
I check over the controls of the diving bell yet one more time. Usually I would laugh about how "OCD" I am about checking, double and triple-checking my instruments, but diving to 600 feet is serious business, not something to be at all casual about. I will make no apologies, even in the recesses of my own (admittedly geeky and neurotic) mind.

This is definitely the deepest I've ever been, and I'm an accomplished diver. But it's only the second time I've been down in a diving bell and the first time I've soloed.

Thank God for Mark, up on the surface. Mark's as reliable as the day is long, and knows these seas as well as anyone his age possibly could. He's grown up diving and fishing out here his whole life. Out of a huge family of divers and fishermen, he's the first one of his family to finish college and start working as a marine biologist. I'm so glad we got partnered up by the Institute.

The bell descends further. I'm past 150 feet now, and breathing a little heavier. Vision's slightly blurry. I check my glasses against the fine print on the dials, the bifocals are much more effective. My ears won't pop from the pressure and it is affecting my hearing. I toggle the communications switch, and hear Mark saying something garbled, something about the controls?

I clear my throat. “Philip here. All seals working well. Still having trouble hearing your transmissions. Over.”

More dull crackling noise from the comms. I shake my head. We continue the slow descent and I keep making detailed notes in the paper logs so we can compare with the films and tapes for reference later. Sonar shows some schools of fish, and some interesting large silhouettes at the edge of instrument range. I scan the camera banks in between passes over the dials and displays to make sure everything's okay. Sudden flashback to driver's training, and chuckling, I remember how I aced the driving test. This is nothing like that, of course, a diving bell is both more complicated and more simple than driving a car. Feeling pretty confident today, however. Everything seems to be going splendidly, despite the comms and their glitchiness.

The bell descends even further, and I feel a little dizzy, damn my ears that won't adjust to the pressure! They hurt horribly now, and definitely seem to be affecting my vision too. There's grey fuzziness in my peripheral vision, and I'm still having trouble focusing, even on the sudden flicker of movement on the cameras.

"Are you getting this, Mark? Left edge of the dorsal view. A light keeps shimmering in and out on that side. Over."
I have difficulty hearing the response. The comms crackle. I hear a voice making noises, though it's unclear, then, "Yes. Left ... blue light."

It looks almost like one of those music videos, where a spotlight follows the performer around the stage, only... only it's moving in three dimensions, and I've never seen anything move so FAST. I have trouble tracking the whatever-it-is. The movement style is atypical for any of the big sea creatures I've spent years studying.

"Mark, Mark, please tell me the video feeds are working, and that you see this. Have you ever seen anything like it before? It seems totally unfamiliar to me!"

I frantically check all the video monitors as the comms fill with static and clutter AGAIN. Flick a glance over the dials. We're still descending, and the creature, this new creature, seems to be pacing me, pacing the diving bell as it descends.

"Mark, did you see a tail? Dorsal rear view?"

Mark's reply this time, "Yes ... seeing it. ... blue ... fish ..."

My vision is getting even cloudier, but I'm determined to get a good focus on this fish. This may be a new discovery, a new paper, for Mark and me (and the Institute, of course)... We could really make a name for ourselves! We could...

uh... wait. What? Is this really happening?

Hair is swirling around the face, the human face, of the creature swimming slowly around my diving bell. It definitely appears, well, mammalian, in spite of the blue color to the skin, and the scales that begin mid-torso, right where a human would have a navel.

I'm yelling.

"Mark, Starboard Center camera! Do you see anything? Check the goddamn Starboard Center Camera!"

Seriously, I'm gonna die if we don't have this on film. This is INCREDIBLE. Myths come to life, proof on camera, everything I've dreamed of since childhood! I'm absolutely euphoric!

“Philip ... big deal ... right there. Right there.”

I'm breathing heavily, and my vision isn't getting any better. I stumble over to check the gases mixture and make sure everything's OK. It's not great, but it's within safe parameters. I think.

Except that my vision's narrowing, and my ears make all the bell's instrument noises sound like I'm underwater (OK, I do know I'm underwater), or in a cavern or something...

... and I feel the back of the dive chair pressing hard at the back of my neck, but I don't have the strength to raise my head
... and the grey at the edges of my vision is turning to black...
... and it's getting kind of hard to breathe...

This has been my LJ Idol entry for week 20, and I intersected my entry with [ profile] grail76's. You can read his entry HERE . We worked with "intersubjectivity" and "rapture of the deep".

Please feel free to enjoy the work of my talented colleagues, and vote for the entries that you enjoy, HERE.
labelleizzy: (bunny writer)
Smoky candle wick
Relit by match through the smoke
Magical science!
Silver sooty snuffer burns;
Pain and blisters as I learn.

Around the campfire
Dreaming, mesmerized by flames:
Red, gold, blue, orange.
Flash! Roar! Swoosh! Whiskey on coals!
“You guys actually DRINK that?”

Many fires go out.
Dad dies. Grief drags us all down.
Under the rain and fog
Slog through the mud seeking joy
In Library, Students, Books.

Candleflame, cauldron.
Friends in darkness, points of light
Sometimes belonging
Ritual, dance, myself, words...
The sun comes out, the rain stops.

A phoenix, reborn:
Passion flames as strength returns.
Tattoo needles burn,
Fighter’s heart burns fear for fuel
Crucible of warriors.

This is my Week 15 entry for [ profile] therealljidol. This week's prompt was "A terrible beauty has been born."
The link to the poll is HERE if you would be willing to vote for me, thank you.
Please follow the elegant and finely-crafted link HERE to read the excellent work of my colleagues in this endeavor.
labelleizzy: (changing habit)

Got myself to the gym today, woooo


last night I had the devil's own time getting to sleep. I had that talk with Jeff and it relieved my mind and heart but apparently all my residual stress went and knotted up my body. I tried stretching, it was 2 am, and my hips that usually go /click/ went /CRACK!/ and then my knee was sore, so I knew I had it bad... hips, shoulders, mid-back, hamstrings, jaw muscles... all so tense they wouldn't SHUT UP.


I took one of the leftover painkillers from after the knee surgery. they generally have a nice muscle relaxing quality, I get warm, and as they wear off, my skin gets randomly itchy. so I don't use one unless it's pretty bad. it was indeed pretty bad. I tried for what felt like hours to fall asleep, even with the help of stretching, warmups, and the painkiller, and then I think I just rested, without sleep. or else I dreamed that I wasn't sleeping, so not much more restful.


Christmas was the last week I had regular work and a regular exercise routine. twice a week at least.


I have decided to engage with one of the trainers at the gym. I can't make my goals alone, at this point.


* strength and flexibility enough to where I am able to take a yoga or dance class without worrying if I will last through it,
* enough stamina and wind to go to a Gaskells ball or Friday Night Waltz and dance as much as I want to...
* and building a plan for habitual enjoyable exercise that will last me into my Croning Years or Dotage or beyond.


I did get in and get moving today, I did start loosening up the crunchy crusty stressy painful joints and muscles, with gentle and intuitive stretches after I warmed up on the treadmill, and light upper body work. Bare minimum stuff.


I'll hurt less tonight, hopefully sleep better, but in order to IMPROVE my condition, I need someone or something else to push me. I do best when I have a class where I do the thing regularly. Yoga and 5Rhythms, I'm hoping to get back to them.


Want to try Zumba! Want to try Nia. want to try Pilates, and I most sorely want a Bellydance or Hula class.


One step at a time. Get Moving first, then Build Momentum, then Add New Skills.


(dancedancedance) (wanna get dancing)


but for right now, my eyes are crossing.
To bed, to bed!


labelleizzy: from lj user= angelbob (creative resourceful sane)

Today is day 5 post surgery and about a week since I've had a serious workout.
And ye GODS is the body complaining!
the hip muscles HURT, the hams are tight and short, quads hurt to stretch, I keep stretching arms and back, but it's not enough.


I wanted to go yesterday but the timing didn't work, and Jeff is on vacation so it is hard to leave him... it's lovely having him home, but he hasn't got a regular habit of movement yet, and can sit or lie on the bed for hours.  And I don't think I can do that anymore.


found myself lying in bed an hour ago, trying to stretch out the discomfort,  realizing I was feeling resentful. Resentful!  of my body! because it demands movement! I reminded myself that this is what I want. Not the discomfort, surely,  but to be moving regularly, to have a strong, ideally unbreakable habit of movement and strength. Such a strong habit that I can trust myself to take care of myself into my eldering.  I'm not there yet, not at 42, but the early signs are here. Silver hair, skin cancer, wrinkles. Thank the gods I'm still bleeding every month, I couldn't handle The Change atop everything else that's happened this year.


My body is undeniably stronger. What's also undeniable is that this habit of moving must be carried forward or I will suffer, risk backsliding,. and miss out on the chance to meet my goals.


They are important goals, goals of strength and independence and fun. Goals of self care and an ongoing ability to contribute in the world.
this is an ongoing "put on your oxygen mask before putting someone else's on."


This is non-negotiable. This WILL be done,
And the nice thing about this 100 things challenge is that I can use my Livejournal addiction to feed this new habit till it can take root and grow strongly to shape my life.


yay for healthy addiction?   =)

labelleizzy: (strong)
Ultimately today was good. Found out what I needed to so the car can be fixed (I popped a side mirror off, backing out in a rush), wrote once today already, worked out at the gym for 90 minutes and really challenged myself. 100# on the leg press, double and single leg work both, 22 minutes on recumbent bike, 20 on various weights including pectoral machine for the first time (that was direfully needful!) Also 20 minutes on treadmill, front, backwards and sideways, and about 20 minutes of a gentle sort of yogish floor stretching.

Feeling like I have some muscles again. It's nice. Been awhile. (Grinning)

And then I went for a cheap pedicure. Purple toes for sandal season, people! This pleases me.
labelleizzy: (strong)
Got to the gym yesterday. 20 minutes bicycling, and at least that much on the weight machines. Am avoiding the quad and hamstrings machines till I get my Orientation session and can ask one who knows how to properly adjust the machines so I don't do anything that has potential to hurt my knee.

Must sign up for regular check ins with a trainer so I develop muscles in a balanced way. And while I have learned a lot down the years about how my body works and how to address its needs, this is a time to work with an expert.

Working out improves my mood and helps me get stuff done, it's a bit like the momentum you build when running or biking down a slope while approaching an uphill...get a little extra traction on The Next Thing.

Feeling a bit under the weather today. Going to strive to do the right thing, the kind thing, as much as possible today.


Mar. 27th, 2009 12:59 am
labelleizzy: (just write)
I don't even know HOW many hand-written, double-spaced pages I'm winding up with,
but it's good,
and I'm done, and happy with the work.
It got done how it needed to get done, and I managed to distill it down into a better form, thru the process of waiting and wondering and letting the ideas just work in me.

This kind of Pathwork is immensely satisfying.
labelleizzy: (Default)
I forget if I've mentioned this before, but I'm remembering again something I've been learning and been having driven home lately.

There are somethings I learn fast. Facts, new words, stuff I read, individual items that can be hooked into my trivia-brain or easily attached to prior knowledge in a chain or network...

However. Yes, however much I have in the past prided myself on my ability to learn, and learn quickly, there are MANY THINGS THAT HAVE TO BE LEARNED SLOWLY AND GRADUALLY. New physical skills (bicycling, yoga, taekwondo, and remember fencing? yeah.). New thinking and concentration skills. New musical skills (yes, those in particular) MUST BE PRACTICED so they STAY.
Practiced SLOWLY AND GRADUALLY, Elizabeth, yes, you have to practice, yes, regularly, yes, it has to be a habit, yes you can do it, you need to develop the positive habits. *pats self on shoulder* You've done it before, remember how good that felt? Go find that feeling again.

Also, there are many things that cannot be simply done ONCE and then you're DONE with them.
No matter how many times I wash the pans that are sitting in the sink, there will be more.
Ditto laundry, ditto sweeping the floor, ditto taking out the trash, scooping the litterboxes...
Yeah, I KNOW you just DID them, they need to be done AGAIN.
*rubs eyes wearily*

Again, with regular habits built a bit at a time, huge stuff can get done. Make your habits your servants... I think that's a Franklin-Covey philosophy or quote, Habit is an excellent servant but a poor master...

*goes to look up the quote*


labelleizzy: (Default)

September 2017

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