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[labelleizzy]

Had a hugging dream this morning. At a gas station, I run over to Lefty (dream-you gives good hugs too) & then realized I had no mask, went yikes, and woke up.

The other mini dream I had was less fun
In the dream Donaldo trumpissimo wanted to have sex with me. And I was taking refuge in the extremely formal language that I use to keep distance from unwelcome people, and in the dream I looked around the oval office (in retrospect I'm surprised I wasn't feeling regret that This was how I got to see the oval office) and I remember feeling extremely cautious about how I might successfully exit the room unassaulted, fully expecting that secret service and other guards would be no help in getting me out of the situation.

After I woke up this second time, I lay there still feeling cautious and on guard, and I realized something about the "grab them by the pussy" remark which is incredibly obvious in retrospect.
Trump said "they just let you do it"
And I realized that was simply a "freeze" reaction, of the "fight, flight, fawn, freeze, fuck" series.

And most women I know got trained out of their bodily autonomy before they were out of grade school. Poisonous culture.

More to chew on here. No solutions, not yet.

Comments

[kareina]

Ewww, that second dream is horrid. I hadn't ever heard the part of the quote where "they just let you" before, but yup, if someone "just lets you" do something unwelcome, then it is because they were so upset about it they just froze. So glad that many people today are emphasising the part about getting consent first, perhaps, if we are lucky, that can lead to a solution?

[labelleizzy]

Upset, betrayed, angry, and trained out of the healthy-fo-us reaction of striking out, getting away, speaking out. "How dare you?!?" Used to be an often used script against violation of our boundaries.
Perhaps we should bring that back, and other defensible gestures.

[tshuma]

"How dare you!?!" is only something I can say when I feel safely supported by the people around me and society at large and there isn't a big power imbalance.

The people Trump is often saying such things about are usually models, or miss america contestants, or television staff for whom the balance of power is decidedly unbalanced, and the consequences of making a fuss can affect one's career.

[cjsmith]

Our culture is SO AWFUL. SO SO SO AWFUL. In this and many other ways.

What a horrible dream; I hope you can shake off any emotional fallout of it today.

[labelleizzy]

It was a surprisingly intellectual-level dream, not very emotional at all. No sense of real pending doom, more like the EW of finding a bug on you that grosses you out (which for me, is relatively mild.)

Here's something interesting: this post, one of the very few I've made mentioning 45 by name, failed to crosspost to livejournal. Huh I wonder why. *Eyerolls*

[cjsmith]

Glad it wasn’t strong emotional content.

Hah, interesting indeed. Sigh. I miss what LJ once was.

[tshuma]

Icky dream. I'm glad you got out of the situation without further repercussions or emotional depth.