Hearing aids and not

Today there was a super cute moment where one of the local birds flew up and perched on the front porch railing.

Flew away, came back with a friend, they were clearly chirping. I could see it through the window, it was obvious that they were, but between the constant tinnitus, the dryer running, and the window between us,

I couldn't hear them.

I mention this to Jeff. He's surprised. "I don't have my ears in" "no but you really CAN'T hear that?"

The bird, still being cute, obligingly chirps again >o

And I pay attention, but nope. Can't hear it.

This is the baseline now.

Like my vision is good enough for most things but I can't read without the glasses unless the font is pretty big and distinct.

(I have actually stopped myself from "zooming in" with my fingers on printed menus.)

This is what 51.75 looks like.

Hearing damage, wrinkly skin, some visual deterioration, some scars inside and out, emotional and physical.

New competencies.
New self knowledge.
New understanding.

It is what it is. And that's okay.

Getting older is still so much better than the alternative.