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Something I might actually say to some people:
"I know that you had a range of possible choices about how to react in this situation. I'm not sure I understand why you felt it necessary to react in the way you chose to. Nor am I sure about what the end result is you want after your declared choices."
"I know that you had a range of possible choices about how to react in this situation. I'm not sure I understand why you felt it necessary to react in the way you chose to. Nor am I sure about what the end result is you want after your declared choices."