ext_18863 ([identity profile] labelleizzy.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] labelleizzy 2014-10-20 01:39 am (UTC)

God, I used to judge myself SO HARD for every perceived imperfection, every moment of m life (all of them) that didn't match some idealistic view of how Life Was Supposed To Be In The Suburbs.

It was really hard to have no allies at home and no friends at school till I was ... Thirteen? Fourteen? And then when you're raised semi-feral it takes a good long while to figure out how to trust and who's worthy.

You just don't KNOW these things when you are young.

I used to substitute teach here on the Peninsula and I would find myself simultaneously glad for and deathly envious of the teenagers in those schools. Healthy, glossy, safe.
That's what growing up with a family SHOULD look like. And you should NOT need a first crappy marriage and some years of therapy to figure out and heal from your childhood, dammit.

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