Be the change you want to see.

Fitness and FUNCTIONAL strength/balance

2021-10-11T07:39:18Z

This year I've tripped, or misstepped and fallen to hands and knees at least twice. I credit my trainer Etty for the reflexes my body needed to be able to pull back and not *eat it* from falls like that... Both would have been a lot worse if I hadn't been strength training.

I also give myself credit, for showing up, being honest, doing the work, and for letting her teach me to be gentle with my own body. We work not past the pain but with the pain, allowing the pain to educate and to be the boundary holding the workout.

comments

Dory was right

2021-07-28T17:50:05Z

Like in finding Nemo? Dory was right.
You've got to just keep swimming swimming swimming...
:)

My leg and hip are hurting a lot less. I think Etty and I are successfully digging into the tight/locked up/atrophied muscles that have been causing me such pain over the last several months. Hip rotational work is good, feels good, and I can feel things releasing bit by bit.

Thank fuck she's patient and gentle, because I still struggle to hold those concepts in mind (and body) simultaneously with "working out". And "me".

She's teaching me to be gentle to myself the way that my cat (who is sometimes a very bitey little calico) has taught me how to be gentle to other people (and critters.)

Slow. Steady. Regular.

And the body is changing.

We're not where we were, my body and me. But nobody's is. We're all figuring out how to care for ourselves and each other in a world 🌍 where Covid is A THING, and it's still causing fear and damage... And I have folks who care. And I care about myself.

A little bit every day. Just a bit. And I can build my wind back by my next birthday (November) because I do well with long distance goals, and I can do a little bit every day that hurts in the good way. Gods know nobody is going to do that FOR me.

Okay. I'm feeling good.

(I learned this week that I'm in menopause. 71 on the FSH blood test. And I'm feeling like, an unchained self, beneath some piles of old chains that I've been moving off me for DECADES. I have other feelings, not yet fully identified yet.)

comments

Oh wow, I hurt less

2021-07-07T17:33:48Z

Last night we had dinner at friend's house and they have a saltwater pool (it's very luxe, DO RECOMMEND)

ALSO they have a jacuzzi with jets strong enough to do authentic massage.

It was my first time in a pool in over 2 years I think.

Took a leisurely swim and float, looking up at the stars, chatting with L, one of the daughters of the family, and then I did oopsy daisy over into the Jacuzzi from the pool and had the jets absolutely POUND my sore places in back and hips.

Today, the world is beautiful, and nothing hurts.

comments

labelleizzy @ 2021-01-11T06:52:00

2021-01-11T15:15:34Z

It's 6:52 am and still dark outside. I've probably been awake for about 2 hours, woke myself up massaging my arm in my sleep and I guess the pain woke me.

Remember that silly song from childhood about bones being connected to other bones?
Well this morning I was massaging painfully tight tiny muscles around my right elbow and upper forearm, and I swear it triggered a nerve spasm in my LEFT FOOT. I had to move carefully, trying to not wake the Jeff... And then I realized that my right hip which has been horrifically tight AND my right hand which has been swollen and painful most mornings for weeks (that's the hand was broken at radius and pinky NYE '16 car crash air bag) was also tremendously easier.

So the elbow is connected to the... Hip bone 🦴 and the elbow is connected to o the... Wrist bone.

I'm sort of both LOL and sort of relieved. Always surprising to relearn something about my body and realize oh yes, I've learned that before.

So I'm up two? Three hours before my alarm? Which can be kind of nice once in awhile, as long as I can be quiet. And I'll sleep 💤 super well tonight.

Which means no tea, and no warm food just yet. Because everything I want for breakfast requires microwave (fucking LOUD BEEP), kettle (sustained rumble of boiling and loud click) or stove (which I just can't put pans on the stove quietly).

(Don't wake the Jeff)

Emergency cheese is good for now, and water. And a cat lap to help me stay warm.

I'm decently proud of getting dressed, glasses, hearing aids, exercise clothes and warm socks, quietly in the dark.

comments

Cyst update week 7 (medical TMI)

2020-10-26T02:50:48Z

7 weeks ago today this puppy busted open and I started squeezing the business out of it. For a long time the keratin exudate that would come out when massaged or squeezed, literally smelled like shit. Bacteria? Idk. It doesn't stunk anymore, which seems like a great improvement!

But I've been at this now, maybe it's only six full weeks, bookended by Sundays, today's the seventh Sunday. Things look a little bit different now.

I forget if I've mentioned that there's multiple drainage points (punctum) over the surface, either 3 or 4 I believe, counting the original that has, I believe, closed. So that's fun, not knowing if or where your efforts are gonna bring stuff to the surface.

The last few days, or few times when I've changed bandages and tried expressing the contents, it's been a tossup of whether I'd get the yellowish cheesy looking keratin or a yellowish fluid, rather like when you pop a blister... (Maybe blood plasma seeping into the cyst?) And because it's fluid and the hole is small, guess what happens? SQUIRT 😂

UNEXPECTED BODY FLUIDS ON THE SPORTS BRA TWO INCHES AWAY FROM THE SKIN

Okay. The fluid is also yellowish, of a similar shade to the keratin stuff. And the ongoing massage and manipulation between squeezing and pressure does seem to move stuff towards the exit.

Today I spent about ten-ish minutes expressing, after noticing the edge of bandage was slipping around slightly, which for the hydrocolloids seems to indicate "done now, remove and replace" for my situation.

I'm down to one each of hydrocolloid bandages and witch hazel infused handywipes, so I'm likely going to CVS tomorrow after my workout.

Also I want to share this update with Kaiser and my doctors.

More other stuff happened today, that gets a separate post.

comments

Science, yay and boo

2020-09-23T19:55:06Z

YAY: decent night sleep, banana and limeade for breakfast.
YAY: we got our flu shots on Monday afternoon!
BOO: hips legs and shoulders creaky, ditto spine. I suspect a minor and manageable aftereffect from the flu shot
YAY: after working out with Etty today, she told me to get the foam core roller and roll my back upper and lower, my hips, inner thighs (OW FUCK) AND I ACTUALLY DID IT and feel 27 times better.

BOO: had to do the morning pee cleanup and floor washing again after Tribble pissed on the floor outside the box AGAIN
YAY: got an Rx to help kitty with pain and bloody urine dots
BOO: OMG she sounds like an angry garbage disposal when we give it to her (every 12 hours, coming up on time now
YAY: my cyst is draining!
YAY: hydrocolloid bandages are amazing! The goo is just being sucked up out of the cyst and into the bandage!
YAY: I'm photographing the stages of drainage, it's awesome and gross! (SCIENCE!)
BOO: Had to move my car across the street because the house one over from ours is being demoed.
YAY: I was 6 hours late moving it and didn't get a ticket!
BOO: they haven't started DOING anything yet. *sigh*
YAY: First lunch is 🥭 mango with coconut 🥥 coconut sticky rice and more limeade.
Second lunch TBD.

comments

The state of the Liz

2017-04-01T04:08:23Z

Came to realize today that working out meets my physical needs but also my depression needs, and my ADHD needs. It meets the depression needs by giving me the endorphins. I always feel better and more cheerful after workout. Meets the ADHD needs by providing structure. Working with a trainer helps give me much needed social time/interpersonal time, and because my trainer is how she is, she provides praise readily and she provides corrections so that I'm doing things right. I always feel calm after working with her because she always tells me what I need to do to make sure I'm doing it correctly, and she praises me when I do it right so there's emotional needs that get met in the course of a workout that I wasn't even realizing.

I'm so glad I can afford this investment in my health. I'm so damn glad.

comments